Cinco de mayo...

I was just thinking about the fact that today is May 5th. Exactly one year ago we found out that Jaylen (probably) has Aspergers. We had gone camping the weekend before with my family, and I remember trying to not think about the fact that we were going to find out the results of all of Jaylen's testing on Monday. I wanted things to just keep going the way they were, to be unaware of any problems he might have. I was already figuring they were going to tell us our son had autism, and who wants to hear that? Jaylen was improving, talking better, becoming more social. Surely he was just coming out of his shell, right? Maybe we can pretend a little longer that nothing is wrong... Well, Monday came and Geoff and I took the boys to the school to meet with the psychologist, speech therapist, and special ed preschool teacher. I remember going over charts and graphs and talking over some of the results, and then the psychologist looking a little nervously at me as he was about to drop the A-bomb. But it was Aspergers, not autism. I kind of knew a little about aspergers, but not a whole lot - mostly that it was similar to autism, but very high-functioning autism. I was a little teary-eyed, but in a way, I was actually kind of relieved. Now we knew what we were dealing with and we could start doing just that - dealing with it.

I was a little afraid of Jaylen having a "label" because I was afraid he wouldn't be pushed and challenged; after all, he's an incredibly smart little kid. But the more I thought about it, I realized that a label would not change Jaylen. He is who he is and God made him who he is. Knowing what Jaylen's challenges are would help us understand how to be better parents for him and what services he would need to help him.

Jaylen was enrolled in preschool to start in September, and I had mixed feelings. I was hoping it would be good for him, but didn't really think it would make much of a difference. Was I really ready to put my 3 year old on a bus and send him off to strangers? I had no clue how big of an impact his being in preschool was going to make. Jaylen has come so far, in his behavior, his speech, his social skills, really overall it has made a huge difference. This is not to say we don't still have our challenges, trust me, we do! But he's making so much progress! And as I said earlier, he's one smart kid. He basically taught himself to read, and can now pick up a kids book he's never seen and start reading it with little help. I think math will be a strong point for him too. Counting and adding just come natural to him!

So here we are, a year after first discovering our son (probably) has Aspergers. Tomorrow morning a nurse is coming from the health department for a home visit with me and Jaylen. We're starting the process to have Jaylen officially diagnosed. In July, we will have an appointment in Bellingham with Dr Zinner from Seattle - he works at Children's Hospital and the University of Washington. I kinda have this "here we go again" feeling, like what will we find out this time? I've heard so many stories of kids being evaluated by different doctors and getting different stories from each one. I'm praying this whole process will go smoothly and we'll be able to get a clear diagnosis. But once again, I'm reminded that Jaylen is who he is, and no diagnosis will change that. We love this little (big) guy and nothing will change that either!