Life goes on...

The nurse called this afternoon with yesterday's lab results. She said they dropped "beautifully" from 404 to 49. I was hit with a few different emotions. First, I was a little sad... this is it, our baby for sure didn't make it (not that I really had many doubts after this weekend, but still, this seems more final). But, it was also a relief. I was surprised when she said the doctor thinks I had a complete miscarriage. I've heard stories and the doctor warned me of what a miscarriage would likely involve. What I experienced over the weekend didn't give me the impression that I was done. Nothing that had me reaching for that bottle of Vicodin the doctor prescribed "just in case." So, I've been afraid this could go on and on, they may want to do a D&C or medication to move things along, and honestly, I didn't want to do that if I could get away with not doing it. So I'm thankful this won't be a long, drawn-out process.

Geoff talked with Jaylen on Sunday night, and he handled it pretty well. He started crying a little when Daddy said there wasn't a baby in Mommy's tummy, but recovered quickly. Honestly, I feel kind of bad that we told Jaylen about the baby so early. He was just so excited. And I really didn't expect to have a miscarriage. I had 2 healthy little boys without any problems, and my mom never had a miscarriage, so I thought everything would be fine.

I work one day a week in a medical billing office, and the ladies there are so sweet. April came over last night to bring me some work, and had a gift and card. All the girls left little notes and signed the card, and then I opened the gift - the "Remember" Willow Tree figurine. Let me tell you, the tears started all over again! I so appreciate everyone who has been praying for us... it means so much to know people are thinking of us and praying.

I do believe that our baby is in heaven with Jesus now. That is both comforting and sad at the same time. Someday we'll see him or her, and what a reunion it will be!